You lost your job, someone let you down, you recently got divorced, or a friend screwed you over; whatever the catalyst, it’s left you bitter, sarcastic and ‘over it’. Firstly, I GET IT. Life can be hard as F$#@ sometimes, and it’s not fair. On any of us. But the truth is that the results of such circumstances don’t have to leave you a ‘hater’.
I was recently in a room with a few rather bitter ladies. Now this is my take on it, obviously, they wouldn’t likely say that they were bitter (but let’s be honest, would any of us?!). I listened to their chatter, which was saturated with sarcasm, dread and negativity. It wasn’t like they were complaining, they weren’t, it was actually quite the opposite. They were merely displaying, through their choice of words, a bitter reality where one feels the need to add a negative take on a mostly happy season.
My take on 4 ways to turn your back on bitterness..
- Admit where you’re at (in a non sarcastic kinda way)
Pronouncing your un-bounding happiness, in a stage of life that speaks otherwise, is unexpected and silly. You’re not ‘totally’ okay, and that’s okay. No, it’s more than okay. It’s expected. You are going through a rough patch/experience and that totally sux. Be okay with not being okay. It’s harder said than done, I get it, but it’s refreshing too. Sarcasm is ugly, for the most part. I do it, so don’t get me wrong, but it mostly comes across as condescending or bitter. Sarcasm is also an easy way to avoid the unspoken, and sometimes that’s necessary but mostly it’s just plain refreshing when you admit that you’re not okay, but you’re getting there (without an added sarcastic or bitter twist on your words).
- Practice gratitude
Whilst positivity may be a stretch at this point, gratitude can come easily if we dig deep. As hard as life may be right now, there is ALWAYS something to be grateful for. I will forever swear by the power of gratitude in helping me overcome an eating disorder 10 years ago; it’s amazing how allowing my focus to not be caught up on the negative but instead on how full my life was, encouraged me to take BIG courageous steps towards creating a life I love.
- Stop justifying. It’s okay!!
My dad challenged me on this recently, when I made a decision that I felt was contrary to how many would approach this situation. Instead of walking proudly in the direction of the choice I’d made, I found myself explaining it to everyone. My dad pointed this out, and asked why I did it, if I felt the need to explain it to everyone. This hit me. HARD. It’s tough to make hard decisions AND tougher to make decisions that others may not agree with/approve of; but make them we have to. And we CAN do so with self-assurance. Do what you need to do, to be okay with your decision, but try not to let it take over every conversation you engage in over the coming weeks.
Lastly, bitterness creeps in anonymously and brings with it an ugly stench.. honestly assessing your reality and attitude towards life, can empower you to make conscious BOLD decisions towards a life you LOVE rather than one you’re justify living <3