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Posts Tagged ‘Trauma’

Episode 45 – Resilience: How to bounce back when life doesn’t make sense

Life doesn’t always go as planned, in fact it can go quite the opposite. Resilience is, simply put, our ability to bounce back when life throws us hardship. Today, on…

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Harvard Psychology department put out research a d Harvard Psychology department put out research a decade back that suggested that happiness wasn't in fact what we'd all always believed. In their study they came to the conclusion that only 10% of what makes the average person happy is external to themself. This meaning your car, home, travel schedule, the job you have, your relationships. Yes pretty much everything we think makes up happiness in its entirety. You won't believe what makes up the other 90%. Friends, it's simply the way your individual brain processes things. In other words 90% of your happiness level is determined by the way you think and feel.

Yesterday my son (who is 5, almost 6) played in a club soccer match. He is in the U6 C team and yet the way this little guy approaches anything in life,  you'd think he was playing for 1st's. He told me after his match (and having scored 3 goals) that he thinks he will be a soccer man (ie professional soccer player), a golf man, a runner, a surfer, a tennis man and a swimmer when he's a grown up. Oh my heart could quite literally have exploded right then and there. 

Friends we laugh thinking 'shame just to think how life will eventually bring him back to reality' and yet research from the top Psych department in the WORLD states that only 10% of your happiness is actually determined by what is external to you (your job, your soccer team, your bank balance). The real stuff that actually makes you HAPPY is simply how you choose to process that external world. I.e - Your thoughts!!! 

Perhaps let's all take a page from Noah's book today and embrace this day with hope, positivity, gratitude and kindness ❤️
His timing is perfect. He's got you! 🌹 His timing is perfect. He's got you! 

🌹
When you emotionally numb, you often find yourself When you emotionally numb, you often find yourself holding your breath as you wait, in dread, for the pain to return. 

Yesterday this was me. I'd just spoken on 'Strength in the Chaos' but I knew too that my body usually responds now to long days on my feet, and more so in heels, with pain. Chronic, unbearable pain. The kind that landed me up in high care in December 2022 after another big talk and day on my feet and travelling to speak. So yesterday I waited. I rested. And I prayed. 

But it didn't come, friends. It didn't return. Is it that my surgeons have accurately killed off the correct abdominal nerve that clearly did used to trigger my pain... is it God. Is it that I've finally stopped numbing and fearing the pain quite as much as I used to. Im not sure. But thank you Jesus for whichever one it is.

I am whole. I am healed. 

Let's Breathe Beautiful. You've got this battle in the bag too❤️ because He is fighting for you!
"Not all storms end in rainbows. But don't let tha "Not all storms end in rainbows. But don't let that stop you from creating your own one." these were my closing words at a corporate event yesterday. 

Yesterday, I had the privilege of sharing the stage with my old Varsity friend, the celebrity @jsomethingmusic. Of course sharing the stage with a celeb is a privilege but this one felt so much bigger than just that.

J is SO real. So vulnerable and so humble! I shared the key note speech with our audience of 7000, and at the heart of my speech was the message that 'Healing rarely comes from numbing yourself. Let's get real, friends. Let's put down our guards and revisit the wounds of the past 3 years. In turn welcoming back a life of JOY too. Because truth be told - when you numb yourself from discomfort, you numb yourself from joy too!' And gosh - J, you live this! You show up simply as YOU. You shine your light and inspire others to dive deep into their light too.

What a day! Thanks for having us @momentumcorporate

* Hair was a day old and still gorgeous - @synergyhairkloof
The devil may try to steal your peace.. but he doe The devil may try to steal your peace.. but he doesn't deserve it. Reclaim your peace today my friend.

It's a gift in EVERY season. It is not fleeting. It is not based on circumstance. It is yours to take hold of. Right now despite all that is going on around you. 

'And the peace of God, surpassing all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds.' Phil 4:7
I'm so enjoying preparing for my talk for a confer I'm so enjoying preparing for my talk for a conference on Wednesday at Momentum Corporate in Pretoria.

I'll be speaking into the topic of Quiet Quitting and the tendencies in the workplace towards mediocre... all in an attempt to numb due to our lack of tools as to how to deal with the range of difficult emotions that society live with today, post-pandemic and in the current South African climate. I'll also be touching on the relationship between work and meaning. 

It's been a while since I worked in the Psychology field and at first I was terrified to begin preparing this talk.. but as I'm getting into it, I've felt my love for this field I used to work in exclusively, be re-birthed!
"One day.." I'm not buying it. And by it, I mean "One day.." I'm not buying it. 

And by it, I mean every 'one day' quote. It's the one days that have got us all into this state of discontentment as a world and nation. Everyday people are quietly quitting in their day jobs as they dream of lives with deep meaning and flow. 

Well, I simply am not buying it! 

I used to. Buy into this, I mean. I believed that one day I'd step into all that God had for me. But what I didn't realise is that as long as I believed that, I forfeited THIS day. TODAY. You can't live well today when you're longing for tomorrows' tomorrow. But as I wrestled with pain over the past few years, I finally came to the realization that today is as good as any to live with intention. I love parts of my career but no one loves all of their career. I long to exercise everyday but there's a chance I may never be able to do that again. I want a third child but no I don't get to right off THIS season, even if it is one of waiting. One of in betweens.

Beautiful.. you too!! Perhaps you too feel discontent with where your life is at. But don't let your desire for MORE, or BETTER, draw you away from your now. You can find purpose right where you are. You can find depth in this season. There is a point to your today!! And to your tomorrow too!
Create space TODAY for moments that truly recharge Create space TODAY for moments that truly recharge your soul!

© 2021 CAITLYN DE BEER. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

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